mamatrauma

ER nurse and resident knitwit

EBS….*warning* rant follows

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This is what you get when you take 48 overachievers and drop them into an intense BSN program that they paid big bucks for.  Add some inexperienced, xxxxxxxxxx instructors, some xxxxxxxxxx clinical instructors, add a few shakes of time crunch, last minute changes and ambiguous details and those overachievers get exploding brain syndrome.  EBS, it is common I tell you.  Clinical manifestations are; argumentative behavior during class, hyperventilation, low O2 perfusion to the brain, buildup of possibly useful but likely trivial facts in the cerebral cortex, sensation of impending doom and grey matter leaking out of ears.  Treatment suggestions; ear plugs during tests, if it is in the powerpoint memorize it, if it is FYI, memorize it, if it is mentioned in lecture, memorize it, if it is mentioned in last minute bulletins, memorize it, but don’t worry about the details.  Oh, and it couldn’t hurt to give oxygen.  If ICP rises to the point where grey matter starts leaking out of other orifices as well, administer final exam, and apply copious amounts of EtOH, take 2 aspirin and turn off all phones.  I think there was something in the notes about limes and coconuts too but I can’t read it due to the grey matter staining my pages.

Written by knitwitmama

October 21, 2008 at 2:06 pm

Posted in nursing school, rant

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